Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Help Registry: Serenity

2

Name: Serenity

Thank you SO much for your offer of help. Below are some simple things you can do to help us during this time period. When in doubt, ask—we don't mind questions, but we're not fond of surprises when our world is already turned upside down. We really appreciate the thought—it means just as much to have a visitor or a daily email as it does to have food delivered. Choose whatever you would like off this wish list.

Food

Special restrictions: not many. You already probably know this, but Serenity hates cooked carrots and cooked salmon. Otherwise we're equal opportunity eaters and have no food allergies that we're aware of.

Homemade food we love:
1. Simple pasta and tomato sauce or meat sauce
2. Cookies or simple breads made without nuts

Restaurant orders:
1. DeLeo's pizza (978-372-4468): Any of the following: New York, Bianco with mushrooms, or regular pizza with mushrooms. Does not deliver.

2. Peking Garden (978-373-6047): For Serenity: Amazing Chicken and white rice
For J: either of the following: Moo-shi Pork or Chicken with Broccoli. Loves pork fried rice instead of white. The restaurant delivers.

3. Pizzeria Uno Chicago Grill (978-556-9595): For Serenity: any of the following: veggie soup, Chopstick salad (No walnuts, dressing on the side), BBQ chicken flatbread pizza, Grilled Simple Chicken (steamed veggies on the side). For J: deep dish Numero Uno, Uno Burger (cooked medium rare, with American or cheddar cheese and bacon), or Cobb Salad. Does not deliver.

4. Not Your Average Joe's (978-974-0015): For Serenity: vegetable spring roll & large Not Your Average House Salad with either steak (cooked medium) or chicken (dressing on the side please). For J: any of the following: Chicken Carbonara, Chicken Oscar, or Grilled Meatloaf
Does not deliver.

If you're coming from the Boston area, we also adore Anna's Taqueria – a regular chicken burrito for Serenity, with pico de gallo and hot sauce, and a super chicken with everything for J.

Tasks

Y Picking up dry cleaning or other pick-up errands (contact Serenity via email or call us at home in order to find out if we have any needs at this time).

Y Food shopping excursion (contact Serenity via email or call us in order to get our list; we'll be as specific as possible. Please give us the receipts so we can reimburse you when you drop off the groceries).

Y Cleaning (light cleaning—vacuuming, folding laundry, and washing floors is always appreciated.)

Visitors

We love receiving daily emails—they're a low-key way to help us stay connected when we're in the midst of a crisis. We're not always up for visitors or able to return phone calls; so if you could call us or email us before you drop by, we'd appreciate it. And please don't be offended if we tell you we're not up for visitors; we promise it's nothing personal. We just need some time to ourselves for a short while.

Posted by Lollipop Goldstein at 11:20 AM 0 comments  

Monday, January 29, 2007

Help Registry: Melissa

1

Name: Melissa

First and foremost, thank you for offering to help. Below are some simple things you can do to help us during this time period. When in doubt, ask—we don’t mind questions, but we’re not fond of surprises when our world is already turned upside down. We really appreciate the thought—it means just as much to have a visitor or a daily email as it does to have food delivered. Choose whatever you would like off this wish list.

Food

Special restrictions: We keep a kosher home. I’m allergic to peaches, mangoes, and green peppers. Josh doesn't eat coconut. Our son drinks only soy milk (though he eats other dairy). Our daughter is allergic to cinnamon. Neither child eats any chemicals, tree nuts, peanuts, or chocolate.

Homemade food we love:

1. Simple pasta and tomato sauce

2. Muffins or quick breads

(please list ingredients on any homemade food so we know if it has any high-allergens in it)

Restaurant orders:

1. Nam Viet (202-237-1015): Sup Chay (no mushrooms or cauliflower or green peppers. Extra tofu and noodles). Does not deliver.

2. Saigonese (301-946-8002): any of the following: Vegetarian Egg Noodle Soup (with rice vermicelli instead of egg noodles; no mushrooms, green peppers or raw onions; extra noodles and tofu), Shredded Tofu with Vermicelli (no fish sauce); Charcoal Grilled Tofu. Does not deliver.

3. Tara Thai (301-657-0488): Pad Thai Jae (no mushrooms or cauliflower; no fish sauce; extra tofu). Does not deliver.

4. Cheesecake Factory (301-770-0999): any of the following: Avocado Eggrolls, Fire-roasted Artichoke, Chinese Chicken Salad (without the chicken), Barbeque Ranch Chicken Salad (without the chicken), Luau Salad (without the chicken or mangoes). Does not deliver.

Tasks

Y Picking up dry cleaning or other pick-up errands (contact Melissa via email or call us at home in order to find out if we have any needs at this time).

Y Food shopping excursion (contact Melissa via email or call us at home in order to get our list. We’re pretty particular about brand so we’ll be as specific as possible with the list. Please give us the receipts so we can reimburse you when you drop off the groceries).

N Babysitting (while we don’t need babysitting, we sometimes need someone to accompany us when we go out as an extra set of hands or to play with the kids in the house while we’re home).

Y Random weekly errands (these are the things that pop up out of nowhere but need to be taken care of immediately. Contact Melissa via email or call us at home to find out if we have anything pressing that needs to get done—there’s usually a library trip!).

Y Cleaning (light cleaning—vacuuming, folding laundry, and washing floors is always appreciated. Because we have a kosher kitchen, it’s easier if we take care of cleaning our kitchen ourselves rather than explaining the system).

Thanks, but we definitely have these things covered…

1. Food for the kids—they’re so particular and we’re nervous about food allergens, so we like to make everything they eat.

Visitors

We love receiving daily emails—they’re a low-key way to help us stay connected when we’re in the midst of a crisis. We’re not always up for visitors or able to return phone calls. Call or email and ask before dropping over (and please don’t be offended if we tell you that we’re not up for visitors—our moods change from hour to hour also depending on the kids’ schedule). We’re pretty cautious in the early days after kids are brought home, so if we’re in the middle of caring for a new child (even an older child who is adopted), we probably will not want visitors (sorry—we’ll email pictures, we promise!).

Posted by Lollipop Goldstein at 11:23 PM 0 comments  

Help Registry Worksheet

This worksheet is here to jog your mind. Everyone should tailor their page to fit their own personal needs. I left three spaces under most headings, but add or subtract in order to create the amount of spaces you need. The more you can list, the better. But like a gift registry, don’t make it so huge that important things fall through the cracks. Mark the most important things with an asterisk and I will let those who are looking at your help page know that those are the most important ones. List any specific instructions—the more specific you can get the better. Include recipes you would love to have made for you. Give phone numbers of restaurants. Do not include any personal information--the people using this list should know how to reach you (therefore, simply tell them which method of communication is best--but do not list your actual phone number). Truly—let this help registry worksheet simply be a guide but make it unique to your own needs. And don’t be shy—people want to help so let them!

Name (can be a nickname or your real name or even a made-up name—it’s the name that will appear as the heading that you’ll give people to find you on the list):

Food

Special restrictions (food allergies or aversions as well as kashrut or hallal):

Homemade food we love:

1.

2.

3.

Restaurant orders (give the name and the specific order, including any changes you make to the dish when you are doing your own ordering. You can even provide a link if the restaurant has a webpage in order to make it easier for a potential helper who lives far away and doesn’t know the area. Indicate if the restaurant delivers or if the person will need to pick up the food themselves and deliver it):

1.

2.

3.

Recipes we’d love you to make for us (include recipes):

1.

2.

3.

Seasonal foods we often crave:

Fall:

Winter:

Spring:

Summer:

Tasks

Underline (Y) or (N) if you would like someone to do these tasks for you. Provide specific instructions in the space including how they should get your shopping list, dry cleaner info, picking up the dogs, etc.

Y or N Walking the dogs

Y or N Picking up dry cleaning or other pick-up errands

Y or N Food shopping excursion

Y or N Babysitting

Y or N Random weekly errands (the things that pop up out of nowhere but need to
be taken care of immediately)

Y or N Cleaning

Y or N ? (Fill in other tasks that are part of your world)

Thanks, but we definitely have these things covered…

1.

2.

3.

Visitors

List your feelings on visitors in different situations (after a birth or an adoption, you may not want visitors in all of the chaos or you may desperately want company or an extra set of hands. During a period of mourning, you may want to be alone or you may want to be surrounded by friends. Write a brief explanation of how you feel about visitors in different situations). Also include in this space if you wish to receive daily emails or phone calls. Be specific.


*This worksheet may change from time to time to reflect additions or subtractions people have suggested while utilizing it.

Posted by Lollipop Goldstein at 9:10 AM 0 comments  

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

A Cool Idea

From Sarah and Amy:

We’re trying to spread the word of infertility and get our issues publicly noticed. Amy Hibbard and I (Sarah Aarssen) are trying to rally as many infertile couples and their friends, relatives and neighbors to help us in a letter writing campaign to spread the word about infertility.

On Sunday January 28th, we are asking you to send a quick e-mail to a few of the main media telling your story of infertility (media links provided below). We’ve chosen the 28th to signify the average woman’s cycle and are asking the media to not let another cycle go by with infertility going unnoticed (feel free to include this in your letter).

Not everybody is a letter writer or has the time to tell their whole story so I’ve made some quick, easy, fill in the blank, type form letters to make this easy (see below). Of course you are more than welcome to tell your story however you chose, I’ve created these in order to hopefully make it easier for more people to participate.

Please copy and paste this entire message into any other message board you see fit. Please post this notice on your blogs. Please feel free to e-mail this out to all of your friends and family. The more letters we have sent, the greater chance we have at getting noticed!

If you are not able to participate on Sunday the 28th please don’t let this stop you from sending in a letter. Although we would like to have a big influx of letters all on one day to get the most attention every single letter will count no matter when it is sent.

If you cannot find the time to send to every single media listed please pick the few you do have time to write.

Infertile couples have sat and suffered in silence long enough. Please take the time on Sunday to think about your story or the story of your loved one and help spread the word.

Please email me at sarahaarssen@gmail.com if you have any questions or concerns.

Sincerely,
Sarah Aarssen (and Amy Hibbard) on behalf of all couples suffering with infertility


FORM LETTER:
Dear Sirs,

I am writing in hopes that you will (insert your wish for your letter, do you want to spread the word about infertility, do you want to educate your family and friends on how to deal with you emotionally, do you want to get the attention of your congressmen, do you want to ease the pain of other infertile couples).

My (partner and I, husband and I, daughter, son, cousin, friend) is suffering with (male factor infertility, PCOS, unexplained infertility, endo.etc. or just plain old infertiltly) and have been for (insert amount of time). I’ve decided to take a stand and do what I can to raise awareness.
In a short few lines you can exand on what it is you’re hoping to accomplish by this letter for instance: After 2 years of suffering alone with on my husband to talk with I am ready to tell my story and really educate people on how to be sensitive to my situation. OR: After hearing “relax and it will happen" for the millionth time I need to finally speak out. Or: I am so tired of having insensitive comments thrown at me in every direction and need to let people know it is NOT ok to say _______. OR: I think it’s incredible that insurance in the state of _______ will cover Viagra for an impotent man but not medications for an infertile couple. OR: There are so many people suffering through an array of emotions in dealing with infertility but there is nowhere to turn for help or support. Or: My husband and I are at our wits end and don’t know how to deal with this anymore, it’s tearing our marriage apart.

Nobody is saying anything to the millions of couples who are suffering. Nobody is helping ease our pain. I am reaching out to you in order to ask for your help.

Please help break the silence of infertility. Help us spread the word.

OPTIONAL: You can contact me at ________, I want to tell my story. OR I wish to remain annomous but would love to tell my story in confidence. OR I do not wish to be contacted but wanted to open your eyes to what is going on in the US.

Sincerely,
Your name
Trying to conceive for years, or months or years and cycles
Suffering with ________
Here you can list what you’ve gone through such as 2 failed IUI´s, 3 miscarriages, one sucessful IVF, adoption of baby boy, member of the MSN TTC+ month group (or support group) for how long (or member of whatever group or if you’re not a member of any message board you can leave it blank)
OR
Sincerely,
Your name
Cousin of an infertile couple (mother of an infertile son, friend of an infertile woman)

ANOTHER FORM LETTER EXAMPLE:
Dear Sirs,
My name is _________ and I am infertile (or my partner is infertile or WE are infertile or my daughter suffers with infertility or my son suffers with infertility or my best friend suffers with infertility).
I (we, they) have been trying to have a child for ___________.
I (we, they) suffer with ___________.
I am writing in hopes to help ease my (our, their) pain or in hopes to make it easier for the other infertility sufferers. Please help spread the word of infertility.
Sincerely,
Your name
Trying to conceive for years, or months or years and cycles
Suffering with ________
Here you can list what you’ve gone through such as 2 failed IUI´s, 3 miscarriages, one sucessful IVF, adoption of baby boy, member of the MSN TTC+ month group for how long (or member of whatever group or avid reader of name infertility blog or if you’re not a member of any message board you can leave it blank)
OR
Sincerely,
Your name
Cousin of an infertile couple (mother of an infertile son, friend of an infertile woman)

LIST OF MEDIA TO CONTACT:

Posted by Lollipop Goldstein at 11:58 AM 3 comments  

Sunday, January 14, 2007

The Beginning...

This is simply a new space where Josh or I can post when we're both participating in a book club as well as a space for articles and other pertinent information. No need to check back here frequently--it will only be used from time to time and always linked from the main page of Stirrup Queens and Sperm Palace Jesters.

Posted by Lollipop Goldstein at 4:28 PM 0 comments  

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