In Starbucks (level two)

As she stepped inside her local Starbucks, she was greeted by a screeching rendition of her name and felt two arms tightly close around her in an intense hug.

"I am so glad to bump into you! I'm pregnant!!! I just found out like two seconds ago. I peed on a stick in the Starbucks bathroom. I must be at least three months along. I realized this morning that I hadn't gotten my period in for-EH-ver so I ran down to the local CVS and bought a pregnancy test--so embarrassing--and just peed on it and it turned positive. So I am totally pregnant. I just hope it's a girl. I really don't want a boy--yuck. I want a little girl and I'm going to call her Petunia Rose Lily because I love, love, love flowers. Love them! I really want to hear what's up with YOU but I have to start looking for a nanny like...right now. Do you know any nannies?"

• If she feigns deafness, click here
• If she hugs her back and promises to throw the baby shower, click here.